Deciphering Mixed Signals
  • | October 5, 2016
We all have been that type of woman—one minute she is so warm, flirty, and inviting and the other she gives you the cold shoulder, stops responding to your messages, and is a cold as an ice bucket. Whether the situation is new or has been going on for a while, things can get pretty confusing and it’s natural to feel clueless and helpless on how to decipher and handle her mixed signals.

When it comes to why women engage in such hot-cold behavior, here are the most common reasons:

  1. She actually fears that you’ll reject her or take advantage of her vulnerability. Many women have a history of bad relationships that they gave their all and got nothing good back. She may be a loving, caring, and sensitive soul deep inside but if she has been extremely hurt in the past, she will start acting hot and cold in fear of exposing her true self and appearing vulnerable to your eyes.

    Try to be patient and understanding to a point, but at the same time show her that you won’t be waiting for ever that she will make up her mind on what she wants from you. Either way, don’t start to argue with her and blame her for being too sensitive and unstable as this will hurt her even more and nothing good will come out of this for both of you.

  2. She likes you but at the same time, she is flirty and open to talking with other men as well. Most women will flat out ignore you altogether if they absolutely have no interest in you. If she is giving you mixed signals, this means she does have some level of interest for you but it’s not enough to make her stop flirting with other guys to see what comes up. You will notice it if she gets flirty with friends or random dudes online and offline besides you.

    How to handle it: It’s easy to get angry and start calling her off, but don’t do it or you will appear too serious and desperate. Instead, do exactly what she does to you—flirt with other girls as well and play the hot/cold card as well. That will certainly make her wondering and make her either try to catch your attention harder or withdrawn for good—either case, you have gotten your answers.

  3. She can’t make up her mind if she likes you or not. Sometimes she really can’t help it and she can’t make up her mind whether she likes you or not. She may for example like your appearance and style but something in you e.g. your nagging and immature behavior might put her off—or she may feel this way for no particular reason.

How to handle it: In any case, don’t try to discuss the matter with her verbally—this will send the message that you are really dependent on her opinion and willing to do anything to please her which looks kinda desperate. Instead, adopt a more lad-back approach and subtly take actions to make yourself appear more attractive and confident, without asking her exact opinion on it.

Good luck.