Marriage Advice on Knowing the Signs Your Marriage is failing
Every marriage has rough patches. Sometimes it’s hard to tell if a rough patch temporary or permanent. It’s not an assumption to make lightly. You know how you feel. You might even know why. What you don’t know is how to move forward.

Knowing the signs of a failing marriage helps you know if it’s a phase or something serious. You should be able to decide whether to work through your marriage woes or consider moving on.

Here are 8 telltale signs your marriage is failing.

  1. You feel alone in the relationship. The point of being in a relationship is to enjoy companionship. If you’re not getting that, why are you in it? You’ll eventually lose the connection you share. When that happens, a host of other problems come tumbling down. Feeling alone leads to feeling unappreciated, unloved, unimportant, and unhappy.
  2. You’re not interested in intimacy. Intimacy comes in two forms, emotional and physical. Most marriages wax and wane in the intimacy department. Life gets in the way. Kids take precedent, work stress distracts, one or both you get sick. But if it gets to the point where you no longer want intimacy, there’s something else going on. It means you no longer share the close bond that helps hold the relationship together.
  3. You fight all the time. It seems like there’s always something to fight about. Usually, the same thing, repeated. You fight more often than you get along. Everything she does irritates you. Simple conversations turn into arguments, and they build up over time. There’s no way you can talk to her about important issues because it will end in a 3-day separation.
  4. You don’t fight at all. Worse than fighting all the time is not fighting at all. When you give up completely, trouble is boiling. Nothing gets resolved. Instead, resentment builds up and eats away at your happiness. If you stop caring about the issues, you stop caring about the relationship. Apathy is poison for your marriage.
  5. You’ve started to withdraw. In one way or another, you’ve started to remove yourself from the relationship. You don’t want to care anymore, you’re making decisions without her, or you try to avoid spending time with her. Whether conscious or not, the intention is to create space. That way, you’ll have less emotional damage when the marriage ends.
  6. You’re looking for romance elsewhere. This happens when you’ve decided you don’t trust her, or you’ve thought about life without her. It could be as simple as flirting or removing your wedding band in public. Maybe you focus on new people, or you’re thinking of an ex.
You argue about money. One of the top reasons for divorce is money. If your arguments become focused on financial problems, it’s time to step back. Low-income couples are especially vulnerable to these fights. Most of the time, the arguments are actually about money. Sometimes they’re about deeper issues, and the money is used to mask those issues. You compare your relationship to others. If you’re playing the “grass is greener” game, there’s something missing from your relationship. When you envy other peoples’ relationships, your problems will feel bigger than they are. The longer you ignore the issues, the harder it will be to address them.

If your marriage is showing at least two of these signs, it’s time to consider your next steps. If you can still communicate with her, that’s a great place to start. Marriage counseling is an option if you’re not ready to leave. When you can’t work through the issues, you may want to plan your exit.

The path forward isn’t easy, but marriage never is. Knowing the signs of a failing marriage is the first step on the road to happiness. The rest is up to you.